जिजिविषा

There is light rain on the windows

I draw back from it with a frown

I have waited days for this day

Planning, cajoling, scheduling

So that i can get away for a few hours

And enjoy a glimpse of

What i used to be

But then there comes the rain

I am disappointed

But i say, well, another day

This reminds me of olden days

When no amount of rain

Would have stopped me

I have a raincoat, i would say

How can you say there will

Be no rain tomorrow, or the day after, Or the whole month, I would say

And i would run off

No matter how wet or muddy i got

It was worth it to me

The experience of new things

The taste of life

For such is the desperate desire for life

That you only see in the young

And now I am jaded

Or cone could say - wiser

And i easily say

There will be another day

If only my life

Continued for another 200 years

Or a thousand years

I would grow wiser and wiser

Every day

More and more patient

I would then conquer the world

But that is not the way of life

One day my daughter will be

Youthful and desperate

Just as desperate as

I used to be

And she will set out into the rain

I have a raincoat, she will say

And I, powerless,

Or maybe unwilling

To stop her

Will sigh as i set about

Making recovery soup

And setting out her warmest

And dryest clothes

For when she comes back

And just like that

My well made wisdom will tumble

Like a house of cards

Such is the way of life

To make and build

With all the passion

As if it will last into eternity

But then to destroy everything

In an instant

Like a castle of sand

And to rebuild

Again and again and again