Transcending

A constant desire

For the conversation

To move beyond

The entirely banal

And into the

Emotional

Or spiritual

Or best

Into what is

Impossible to

Put into words

The measure of a marriage

I could tell you

How long they have been married

What each of them do

Who earns how much

And who they live with

And where

And that would tell you nothing

About the marriage

The marriage is measured

Not in such facts

But in moments,

In relationships

The relationship between

The number of times

The baby gets up at night

And the depth of redness

In the eyes the following morning 

(Yes it matters, Whose eye it is)

The number of yawns a partner takes

And the number of extra naps they get

The favorite returned with a number of

Unnecessary caresses

And the brightness of

The twinkle in the eyes 

In return

The number of coffee cups

Or teas or waters

That come in twos

Compared to the ones

That come in ones

And the hours spent

Stirring and stewing

The minutiae of life

That would bore

Anyone who is not them

To death 

Yes, these and more,

Are the measures of a marriage

And parenting

That are

Impossible to measure

By any means

(Inspired by, obviously,

Invisible cities)

Unhappy

In prisons

Of our own making 

Battered

Being battered by life

By the constant expectations

People put on you

And the constantly having

To give up

Your wishes

Bottling up 

Your feelings

And the result is

Not so bad after all

 It makes you

More humble

More empathetic

More socially skilled

More capable

And then you think

Perhaps this is necessary

To be a good person 

To grow up

To leave behind

Childish tantrums

Territorialness

Possessiveness

So that's how you justify it

Make peace with it

The constant battering

That life gives you

That's how you accept

With good grace

The new personality you get

Which comes at the price of

All that makes you

You

Everyone needs 

To be a good person

In this world, you say

You don't necessarily

Enjoy life 

In this new skin

But then who does?

You ask yourself

Aren't we all

Sacrificing ourselves

Adjusting

Compromising

At every moment?

Isn't this what

Adulting is?

Sigh. Peace.

But the peace lasts

Only a moment

Until you see a man

Who never had to

Submit to anyone

In that way

And so never learnt to be

Humble

Empathetic

Sacrificing

And continues to 

Have his childish tantrums

And hold on to his

Territories

The wallflower's moment

Born a wallflower,

I would like to be invisible

To the world

Unfettered as I pass by

Unnoticed

Relieved

A sigh of thanks

For not having to

Meet any eyes

Make any platitudes 

I would like to be 

Unseen

By the eyes of

The whole world

Except for yours

For you, 

I would like

To see me

In full detail

I would like you

To know me

To recognize me

To remember me

And to come to me

When you need

A shoulder, a hand

An ear, a heart, a soul

And anything else

That I forgot to mention

If you were a lover

Maybe

This would be

Narcissistic

But since you are

My offspring

I guess

My effusions are

Expected and 

Accepted

Turned off

When they turn off

The light of their attention

Some people

Turn it elsewhere

And simply let you wallow

In indifference

While others

When they rotate

The bright light of affection

Away from you

Will then turn on

The b(l)ack light

Of their hatred

Towards you

I think I know which one

I don't prefer

Wise

And if you explain

The workings of the world

And of my mind

In precise, clear terms

That shine with the glow

Of erudition and

Perseverance and

Maybe even wisdom

Who am I

To impose my 

Airy fairy

Mumbo jumbo

Over it

Who am I to obfuscate 

Lucid knowledge

With blurry faith

That could be no more than

Ignorant superstition