A long time ago,
a serious young man decided the leave the town he was in.
"I was a big fish in a small pond," says my father now.
And he was right,
For the ambitious young man met his match in the big pond.
I, imagining myself to be my adventurous, ambitious father,
left for an even bigger pond.
And came back, because it was a strange pond.
I don't remember thinking, before going, that I was a big fish in a small pond.
Nor do I remember feeling sad, that I did not make it big in the big pond.
I just did not see the point, of struggling in a alien pond
When life was so much better, in the old one.
And I ask myself, if I had been in my father's place 30 years ago,
Would I have risked all for a plunge into the big pond?
I would not have gone anywhere.
I do not want to live forever like an alien,
like I did briefly, like he still does.
In this big pond he still feels like a visitor.
Like he is simply inhabiting this space for a while.
And that eventually he will go back "home," to the hills he grew up in,
As naturally as a schoolboy comes home from school.
If I had been in his place,
I would have gone to the next big town to study,
been awed by the brave new world, and come back.
To live among loved ones.
To a place where people know me and I matter
And my work is more than a drop in the ocean.
I would have been like the smart young women
a serious young man decided the leave the town he was in.
"I was a big fish in a small pond," says my father now.
And he was right,
For the ambitious young man met his match in the big pond.
I, imagining myself to be my adventurous, ambitious father,
left for an even bigger pond.
And came back, because it was a strange pond.
I don't remember thinking, before going, that I was a big fish in a small pond.
Nor do I remember feeling sad, that I did not make it big in the big pond.
I just did not see the point, of struggling in a alien pond
When life was so much better, in the old one.
And I ask myself, if I had been in my father's place 30 years ago,
Would I have risked all for a plunge into the big pond?
I would not have gone anywhere.
I do not want to live forever like an alien,
like I did briefly, like he still does.
In this big pond he still feels like a visitor.
Like he is simply inhabiting this space for a while.
And that eventually he will go back "home," to the hills he grew up in,
As naturally as a schoolboy comes home from school.
If I had been in his place,
I would have gone to the next big town to study,
been awed by the brave new world, and come back.
To live among loved ones.
To a place where people know me and I matter
And my work is more than a drop in the ocean.
I would have been like the smart young women
That you see so often in small towns these days
The smartly dressed, neatly combed one
with great big inquisitive eyes, idealist heart, and ready speech.
the one that listens carefully to conversations
Reads newspapers, frequents the library,
Attends mother group meetings,
Teaches neighbors about hygiene,
Has the history and statistics of her village at fingertips
"Excuse me sir?" I would have said to the visitor
"Who are you? Where are you from?"
How easily I could have been her !
And perfectly happy I would have been, I am sure!
No matter what the size of the pond I was in,
I would try to be the best in my pond,
But not try and go beyond.
The smartly dressed, neatly combed one
with great big inquisitive eyes, idealist heart, and ready speech.
the one that listens carefully to conversations
Reads newspapers, frequents the library,
Attends mother group meetings,
Teaches neighbors about hygiene,
Has the history and statistics of her village at fingertips
"Excuse me sir?" I would have said to the visitor
"Who are you? Where are you from?"
How easily I could have been her !
And perfectly happy I would have been, I am sure!
No matter what the size of the pond I was in,
I would try to be the best in my pond,
But not try and go beyond.
I probably wouldn't miss anything in that life
And yet i would always be nagged by a desire to wander
Even though i would know in my heart of hearts
That those who wander
Only want to wander back home
(“I always wonder why birds choose to stay in the same place
when they can fly anywhere on the earth,
then I ask myself the same question.”
― Harun Yahya.)
then I ask myself the same question.”
― Harun Yahya.)
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