Saturday, January 19, 2019


Everything is So precious
When you decide to lose it
When you decide you won't
See it every day

So heartbreakingly precious
Because you cannot have it

Maybe that's How Its
Meant to be
Because Plenty is

Graha dasha

The planets
Are arrayed against me

(That's my version of
When i came to)

All i wanted

Was a little strength
So that i could be kind
And the universe
Denied me even that

Friday, January 18, 2019


And her nails
Grew out with
Deep, broad ridges
All the way across
All the fingers

That for several years
She did not understand

And Then One day She read
That shock leads to
Deep horizontal bands on nails

In her case it was
The shock of recognition
Of something She had
Known all along
But did not dare face

And later She Would check
Her fingers every So often
To look for traces of grief

Many a time She found
The telltale signs
In her thumb which seemed
The most receptive

But Never again So pervasive
And Never again So deep...

Thursday, January 17, 2019

Tonight i dreamt of keys

It Shall come to you
When you are ready for it

"Losing keys may mean you are experiencing much frustration in waking life. Lost keys may also represent feeling lost or feeling a loss of control, power or authority in some aspect of life."

"If you lose a key, this is the omen of a period of "life" that is coming to an end."

"Keys are powerful symbols in any story. They symbolize opening and closing powers."

"A key in a dream can also portend personality development and spiritual growth. Usually, there is a secret, a mysterious situation in your life, and you are looking for solutions; this is when the key appears in your dream."

Towards warmth

I Would have sent
These little tendrils at you
Moving towards some warmth

but Then i remember
I have troubled you enough
enough, enough, with my woes
When your plate is already full

and so the little tendrils
I let them shrink and wilt
unless they are fortunate
and get splayed on to a page

the long winter

i thought the winter
when it rained and rained and rained
and we walked with sloshing water in our shoes
was the worst

and then i thought the winter
when there was no gas and no heat
and no petrol and we walked and cycled
and we got bone tired every day
frustrated with haggling the daily necessities
and going to sleep crying with frustration
i thought that was the worst winter of all

and then i thought the winter
when i piled on stress and ate to curb
and then piled on fat in layers of layers
i thought that was the worst

how wrong i was
when the worst was yet to come
worse than all of them put together